Discovery

It’s late and I’m bored, so here’s a list of my top ten (American) cartoon theme songs!

What do you all think?

10. Kappa Mikey

The show itself is quite amazing, for a newer cartoon.  The plot centers around a guy named Mikey who wins a contest that gets him a lead role on a Japanese anime show.  Hilarity ensues.  However, in addition to the show being hilarious, it also has a catchy, punky theme song.

9. Muppet Babies

Who doesn’t love Muppet Babies?  With a frog-loving pig, Nanny’s fashion-forward striped tights, and questionable creatures (I’m looking at you, Bunsen Honeydew), you just can’t say no.  I also can’t say no to a cartoon theme song where each character gets his or her own line.  I have blue hair!

8. Tiny Toons

Tiny Toons was one of the first Warner Bros. cartoons of the ’90s to appeal to adults as well a kids by using old-fashioned gags alongside current pop culture references.  It was also the best, in my opinion, and had the best theme song (although Animaniacs was a close second).  The Tiny Toons movie, How I Spent My Summer Vacation is quite possibly the most entertaining piece of animation in existence.  If you haven’t seen it, run, don’t walk, to the nearest movie store and get it.  NOW!  GO!!  You can read the rest of the list later!

7. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

They’re really hip.  Get a grip!  A large percentage of my childhood memories revolve around these half-shelled herpetiles and their catchy theme song.  I wanted to be Raphael, how about you?

6. Captain Planet

Earth!  Fire!  Wind!  Water!  Heart!  Wait…heart?  What the hell?  Did they just need to fit in another stereotype to represent all of the continents?  What about Australia and Antarctica?!  I would sue the Captain himself for discrimination, but I’m too busy doing my choreograped dance I made when I was ten to this tubular theme song.

5. Jem

Jem was outrageous and so was her theme song.  I don’t know about you, but I still covet her amazing makeups and awesome ’80s minidresses (and Rio, meow)!

4. Duck Tales

Adventure!  Intrigue!  Danger!  The ability to swim in money!  Duck Tales had it all, including a theme song that will stick in your head FOREVER!  Sing it with me, folks - Duck Tales, WOO-OO!

3. Rocko’s Modern Life

My ex had a thing about making me perform for people, kind of like a dancing monkey.  I’m an attention whore, so I never really minded much.  One of his favorite Stupid Alex Tricks was my apparently amazing impression of Filburt, the turtle that marries the dentist with a hook for a hand.  Now that you know that pointless fact about me, let’s talk about what’s important: the theme song.  Any TV show about a wallaby that’s best friends with a cow has to have a theme song by the B-52s.  If it were any other way, the world might have stopped turning.

2. Super Mario Bros. Super Show

Technically, this is a variety show, not just a cartoon, but any show that has its own dance is worthy of the number two spot on this list.  Do the Mario, paisanos!

1. Tintin

Blistering barnacles!  This one might be a little esoteric, and it’s French Canadian, but my love of Tintin knows no bounds.  The theme song is so epic, I can’t help but scrunch up my face, emotionally pump my fist, and aggressively hum along whenever I hear it.  I also like to sing it to myself when I’m performing extra daring maneuvers through downtown Portland traffic on my bike.