Discovery

Kiefer Sutherland will serve a 48-day jail sentence after pleading No Contest to his most recent DUI charge. I thought he was the star of “24,” not “Prison Break,” jokes Jay Leno thirteen hours from now.Did Britney beat up K-Fed when they were together? Britney’s camp claims that this is just another planted rumor to “make Britney look like a bad mom,” like the time she had her kid on her lap and we Photoshopped a car around her.Oasis and Jamiroquai say they might follow Radiohead’s lead and forego record contracts in favor of releasing their own albums. Man, it sure would devastate the U.S. record industry if Jamiroquai pulls those “Virtual Insanity” cd singles off the shelves.Oh my god, George Clooney was spotted “swapping spit” with Sarah Larson last night at an “eatery”. Were they also “canoodling” and “scarfing down hot dogs” and doing every other abrasive gossip column action?David Hasselhoff was hospitalized last night after a relapse, which is far less ridiculous than the following sentence: “Hasselhoff, who won primary physical custody of his two teenage daughters in June, has been in Europe for the past month filming ‘Anaconda 3′.”